For 9 years of my life I played competitive softball, of which the last four were in high school.  The stereotype of softball player stated that all softball players are lesbians. The softball team was also known as the “lesbian club” unfair as that may seem. Although I was the starting pitcher and the number 2 hitter in the lineup, I am not a lesbian. That stereotype is actually far from true, in both ways. Yes, it is far from true for people that are straight, but the point I am really trying to make, is what about those other players you automatically assume are lesbians? What about bisexual’s?

My catcher caught for me all of high school and not only was the top catcher in the state, but quite a person. Her name was Brit and she was known far and wide. Brit was the first lesbian in all of my high school to come out. She was also the main talk of the school as she openly dated another girl. When I say main talk, it was actually all positive as Brit was a great person, amazing athlete, and one that had life-changing beliefs when it came to gender and sexuality topics. The greatest thing about Brit, is before she was a lesbian she considered herself a bisexual.  She said she preferred to go both ways, and did not have a preference. Until, one day one something just clicked when she realized she was a lesbian.

I was lucky enough to share this conversation with her as we traveled to an away game an hour and a half away. She put it perfectly, sexuality is produced and declared as one lives, it is not a biological decision, the decision lies within yourself, and not only that, but once you think you may have decided that can also subject to change. Which is why, I relate most of this course to what Brit has told me and what she believed. In Gayle Rubin’s article, she quotes Michael Foucault as “ ‘He argues that desires are not pre-existing biological entities, but rather they are not constituted in the course of historically specific social practices.’ He emphasizes the generative aspects of the social organization of sex rather than its repressive elements by pointing out that new sexualities are constantly produced.”  This line reminds me exactly of Brit. From experiencing first hand, she believes , just as Rubin that biology is just the deciding factor of our bodies and appearances and it is not linked to preference or sexuality.  Having a mother who is also a lesbian, she said that it also opened her up to the possibility of choosing to follow in her footsteps which first brought her to experiment and find her true self. Rubin also touches on that as she points out “Sexuality is constituted in society and history.”

Brit shared many of her opinions and beliefs with me which really did change my views and what were actually taught in school. I decided to write about her because everything that we are learning Brit had previously taught me. The heterosexual matrix we also talked about in class was something she first had told me, aside from using the term heterosexual matrix obviously. She said that she is proud to break the stereotype of being a feminine female and that she considers herself masculine. She also said she has an appreciation for those who are proud enough to represent how they feel regardless of their gender. The second I walked off the bus I never just assumed that every girl that looked feminine is straight and every girl that had a masculine demeanor was a lesbian. Brit is a real life example of what we are currently learning in class.

-Christy Praljak